May 23, 2007
The most common questions from men on hotwifeblog and one I’m always getting asked is “How do I get my wife to become a hotwife?” There are no easy answers but there are various routes you can try to achieving your ultimate goal of getting your wife to fuck another man. I was recently sent this article which details tips and techniques that may be useful to you men out there seeking your hotwife fantasy to come true.
Many thanks to J&M for sending this to me. It’s fairly long so I’m going to post it in 7 parts, one every week or so. Here’s the first segment:
Turning a Wife Into A Hotwife
Part I - “How can I turn my wife into a hotwife?”
First, as difficult as it might be for many people to understand, the issue of “getting my wife to have sex with other men” is now one of the major topics of interest on the Internet - in particular, in Internet chatrooms. Scores of websites featuring photos are devoted to this topic. We’ll get to the “how to” issues after mentioning some preliminary things that should be considered.
Some women immediately embrace the opportunity for sexual freedom. However, I also know that many more are not interested in becoming hotwives, even though they enjoy sex and may have had numerous sexual partners before marriage. Negative cultural and personal conditioning about sexual exclusivity is just too strong. In short, it will never happen. A woman should be in control of her body, and to try to push her into things that she is 100% dead set against will only cause major problems. So if this is clearly the case, forget it; move on to other things in life. Possibly even more important, most husbands, especially in the United States, wouldn’t allow their wives to become hotwives. Although they may entertain these thoughts in fantasies, possessiveness, jealousy and cultural conditioning ultimately prevail. However, at the same time, we know that some husbands seem to handle this without apparent ill effects on the relationship. A few husbands even claim that this arrangement has helped their relationship, especially if the wife was sexually frustrated to start with. One husband in a chatroom conversation said, “…My wife loves sex; she’s great in bed; life is short; why not let them enjoy it?” We are assuming here that you are dealing with a reluctant wife. In today’s U.S. culture many husbands, even in their 30s, have lost interest in sex - primarily due to work stress and various medications. As a result, the wife’s sexual needs are much greater than the husband’s ability to fulfill them.
Although a few wives “could care less about sex” - and that’s a topic covered elsewhere - we’ve have heard from many wives who feel acute mental and physical sexual frustration - so much so that it negatively affects their moods, feeling of well being, and their marriage. Some reluctant wives, if approached in the right way, will be willing to at least to talk about the hotwife option, and this is where things can begin. We’ve gotten letters from husbands who said their wives were very much against it at first, but after talking about it over a period of weeks or months, they changed their minds.
Before discussions begin, the husband must feel that the marriage is totally solid and that it can definitely withstand some real challenges (read: real challenges). It will help the husband’s feelings of security if he feels that his wife knows that she has a good thing in the marriage and other men could not offer her the advantages that she now enjoys. According to one husband, “She knows she has a good thing going with me , and I’m sure she’s not about to give that up.” Before we continue, the following should be considered.
The central question that needs to be asked in condoned affairs is, “Could you have sex with other men without it affecting our marriage or your feelings toward me?” Possibly an even bigger question centers on whether the man can handle the fact that his wife is having sex with other men. The vast majority can’t, especially in the United States. A open marriage or “swinging” is generally much easier for a husband to handle than simply having a hotwife. Even the men who initially feel they can handle this type of arrangement typically discover that jealousy soon enters the picture creating major problems for the primary relationship.This being said, as we’ve noted there are a few men who are secure enough in themselves and in their relationship to grant their wives permission to enjoy sex with other men. In short, they encourage and share their wife’s happiness, even when it stems from spending time with other men.
Likewise, there are a few women who value this type of opportunity enough to keep extramarital sex on the level of simple physical enjoyment, while making sure that it does not negatively impact their primary relationship. Possibly it’s unfortunate, but at the present time this level of selflessness sophistication is rare.
By: Dr. Cherry Lee
Next Week: Getting Things Started